The sun came out today.

I've been on a long journey to good health...well for about the last 9 years when I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease, then later with Hypothyroidism, among many other autoimmune diseases. Through many years of ups and downs, I have found that there is no substitution for good health. There have been so many horrible days with aches and pains, blinding migraines, indescribable fatigue and depression beyond hope. However, with the elimination of gluten from my diet eight years ago, my brain fog has decreased significantly and my energy levels have increased. I have gone from 4 to 5 migraines a WEEK to about 1 or 2 a month. But the effects of gluten were still there and the damage had been done almost beyond repair. Soon after the diagnosis of Celiac, the Thyroid problems started and have not ended. The energy comes and goes, along with the depression and anxiety. Some days are harder than others. The weather affects me greatly. It has been raining for 4 days straight... and then today the sun came out. It was like I could breath again. It was like God saying, there is an end to all of this. You can do this, girl! 

So today as the sun is shining down, I am starting a new journey of eliminating all processed foods, dairy, and grains and sugar. I will do it consistently and without any cheat days until Thanksgiving which is exactly 30 days from now. I feel like the last 10 years have been leading up to this day...as corny as that sounds. I have been on a roller coaster of eliminating chemicals, processed foods and meats pumped with hormones. I'll juice for a week and feel fabulous and then fall off the wagon and eat a bag of chips and immediately regret it. 

There is no substitution for good health.

I know without a shadow of a doubt that the foods I put in my mouth affect me not only physically but emotionally. I am excited about the next 30 days and plan to blog about this journey along the way so stay tuned!

My Celiac Story:: a look back

Today is National Celiac Disease Awareness Day and as I was posting a little something about CD (Celiac Disease) in my Instagram account, I started thinking back about my journey.

I was first diagnosed with Celiac Disease is 2007 after years of doctors appointments, blood tests, etc. I even remember having some sort of neurological test done where they stuck little sensors all over my head and monitored me for a certain number of awake hours and then several hours while I "slept." But I just remember thinking, "Who the heck can sleep with all of these things sticking to my head?" They were like little leaches sucking the life out of me like the very disease I was living with, yet had no knowledge of. 

I remember taking monthly plane trips from Little Rock to Love Field in Dallas to see specialists. This went on for years all while I was working at the Arkansas Baptist State Convention. I hated having to call my boss each and every time I would wake up sick and have to leave to go home sick. They were so understanding of my weekly and sometimes daily migraines, stomach aches, body aches, etc. 

You see even though I was eating gluten free after my diagnosis, it was no walk in the park immediately following. For years following the diagnosis, I suffered the effects that gluten had ALREADY done to my body. For over 20 years, I was putting poison into my body, yet I had no idea. Sometimes Celiac Disease can be evident at birth or it can be triggered by physical or emotional trauma. In my case, I truly believe I had Celiac Disease from birth but showed little or no systems until my body was under severe physical AND emotional trauma from the loss of my grandmother and the loss of my best friend just months later. These events took place my Freshman and Sophomore years of college. College is stressful enough with moving, making new friends, pledging, homework, tests, etc. All of this stress, piled with the depression from the recent loss, my body began to show signs of malnourishment, fatigue, skin rashes, severe migraines lasting days and sometimes weeks, chronic, constipation (in college I honestly thought that it was normal to only have a bowel movement like once a week- this is NOT normal by the way), hair falling out, chronic back & joint pain, and the list goes on...

Flash forward to September 13, 2013. Today. And it all seems like a bad dream. A nightmare really. But I must remember how real it was because people all over the world are going through what I went through (and worse) every single day.  So am I 100% new and improved? No definitely not. There are still days where I sleep til 9 or 10am because I overdid it the day before and need about 3 cups of coffee to get going. But there are less days where I can't get out of bed at all! I rarely have severe aches and pains anymore. My migraines have decreased to about 1 every other week or so. I see a chiropractor twice a week and try to get a massage at least once a quarter. All of these things may sound like I'm spoiled but I have learned (mostly from my mom and my doting husband) to take care of my body because it's the only one I have! 

In the past 6 months even, my energy levels have tremendously improved with a recent change in doctors. With the help of about a dozen different supplements, most days I have more energy than I have felt in probably 15 years! I still have about 30 pounds to lose and my doctor says my hormone levels are still not exactly where they need to be but I have VASTLY improved.

My goal in the next few years: be healthy enough to have a beautiful healthy (gluten free) baby and this whole nightmare will have all been worth it. 

My encouragement for you: To anyone out there who feels like life can't possibly beat them up anymore, it CAN GET BETTER!  Take a look at your diet. It really is all about what you are eating. Do your research. Educate yourself. And most importantly, TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY because it's the only body you will ever have. God gave you a beautiful body, now go fill it up with wholesome, organic and nutritious foods! 

Our Scary Morning.

This morning, B and I were relaxing and hanging out talking in bed like we do most mornings before he goes to class. Neither one of us are morning people. We might wake up at 8 or even as late as 9 am, but we are most productive in the afternoon, evenings and even into the wee mornings hours. I guess our clocks never reset after college. Sometimes you'll find us awake at 2 and 3 in the morning. That's when I get my best editing done. Anyway, we were waking up very slowly, talking about our dreams that we had the night before and our plans for the upcoming day. We recently started watching Breaking Bad all over again and I had a dream that B and I were hiding a liquified body in a plastic container. Seriously. If you haven't seen Breaking Bad, then you have no clue right now. (Season 1. Episode 2.)

So as we were talking, checking email on our phone, seeing what's happening on Facebook, you know the usual morning routine... we both heard a sad pitiful yelp come from my baby Conner. Any dog mom knows this yelp of helplessness and I pray to God you never have to hear it. EVER. Something horrible was happening to my dog Conner and I had no clue what it was or what to do. The next few minutes were mass chaos, at least in my mind. I'm pretty sure B stayed reasonably calm throughout the entire event. I kept screaming WHAT IS HAPPENING? Conner's jawed was clinched tight. His paws went straight over his face as if he was covering his eyes or something. His entire body tightened in panic and was trembling. I didn't know if he was choking or if he had broken a limb. All I knew was that something was seriously not right. B mentioned a seizure and then it hit us like a ton of bricks. That's exactly what was happening- he was having a seizure right in front of us and there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it.

Of course, I screamed, cried and yelled for the seizure to stop, but it wouldn't. I tried petting him, talking to him, rubbing him and when all of that failed, I just sat there helpless and watched as the seconds dragged on.

A couple of minutes had gone by and no improvement. We quickly realized that an emergency vet visit was a must. With tears in my eyes and panic in my mind, I threw on the first thing I saw...which I realized later was an Arkansas tshirt B had bought me, dirty jeans, slippers and a camouflage hat. Seriously, I probably looked like some sort of hillbilly. But at the time I didn't even think of it. I just scooped Conner up in my arms and headed for the nearest vehicle in our driveway. He peed on me on the way to the car, but I didn't care. All I cared about at that time was him not dying. I remember yelling "You're not dying on me, Conner, not today!" So dramatic, now I realize that, but that is how I felt.

I thought my baby was seriously dying in my arms.

I know for all you parents out there, this post may sound silly or dramatic but we don't have human children. Conner, Scooter, Hazel, Charlie and now Lannie Cat are our children. We buy them presents. They even have their own stockings. They sleep with us. I talk to them constantly. I work from home so I hang out with my fur children more than any other human being on this planet and to be honest, I wouldn't have it any other way. I honestly like my pets a lot more than most human beings...and that's no joke, y'all.

So you see, to lose one of these guys, is exactly like losing a member of the family because to me, they are 100% family. Our animals are what makes up this family. We spend 90% of our time with our animals and we CHOOSE to everyday. So we may be known as the crazy animal lovers but I'm okay with that. Because until you love an animal, you have not experience the kind of love that is 100% selfless, loyal and devoted.

Conner came out of his seizure about the time we were pulling up at the vets office. He was scared and continued to pee on me and every vet assistant in the office but that's a Cocker Spaniel for ya. :) He is now completely better and is sitting on top of my feet even as I write this. The vet told us that epileptic seizures are common in Cockers and for us not to be shocked if this happens again. If this becomes more common, there is some medication we can get him on to prevent seizures. I might have to get MYSELF on some medication if this starts happening more often! I'm not sure my heart can handle another morning like this morning.

I will definitely be more prepared if this happens again but until then, I will continue to cherish every single day I have with him. Like with any person or animal, I know our days are numbered. Events like today definitely make you stop and appreciate the life we have with our furry friends.

I love our little crazy zoo and right now in life, I wouldn't have it any other way!

New Beginnings

Buie & I ordered a juicer today. We are going on this cleanse, detox, eating raw foods hard core. I know you're thinking..."Blah, blah blah. We've heard it all before, Cara Beth." And yes, it's true I started a detox right before Thanksgiving but seriously who starts a detox right before Thanksgiving??? Right after we decided to start our detox, we also decided to move so our cleansing plan fell to the wayside. Buie actually made it further than I did. He even ate vegan for like 3 days straight which is huge for my meat and potatoes guy. 

I'm sick of being tired all the time. I'm sick of being worn down. Quite frankly I'm sick of being sick. While I have made a HUGE improvement in my health over the last few years, I am no where near where I need to be. I am willing to try pretty much anything at this point. Juicing has been something I've wanted to get into so we took the plunge tonight and bought one. So hopefully I can blog about our juicing as we stay on this difficult journey to good health. I have to be honest. I'm really excited to get started! 

So here's to new beginnings, good health and hopefully some great juicing recipes! 

I'm so ready for Spring. Anyone feel me on this one? 

Clearing Things Up

Getting sick is never fun especially when the only treatment is to just wait it out. The past few days have been a haze of snot, coughing & nose blowing .  I'm honestly not sure if what I had was just the common cold or more like a sinus infection but whatever it was, it was vicious. I'm a big advocate of holistic medicines when they apply. I am not 100% holistic when it comes to medicines, more like 80/20. There are some things Western medicine does better. But when possible, I like to boost my immune system the natural way without taking OTC medicines.

This weekend my head was so stopped up it was hard to breathe. I went to Whole Foods and stocked up: echinacea, vitamin C, local honey & organic lemon. And yes, I stopped at Walgreens and purchased a few over the counters in case the all naturals didn't cut it: Sudafed and Clariten. But by far the award goes to....... drum roll please........ The Netti Pot. The NasaFlo is the brand I used. I think it's the off brand but it works just as well.

Now let explain: I'm not an herbalist or hippie. I'm not some far out person who tries weird things. I would consider myself pretty normal. I was actually extremely skeptical about this product. I have seen this product in use and it absolutely grossed me out. (Warning: do NOT watch YouTube videos of people using this product if you are skeptical about this product. It will weird you out.)

The reasons I broke down and tried this:
1) Nothing else I used even came close to clearing up my sinuses
2) Everyone who used it (and used it properly) LOVED it and highly recommended it to me
3) I thought I was going to die soon if I didn't at least try

This product cleans out your sinuses and helps you breathe. It might be awkward, gross and well uncomfortable but you will immediately reap the benefits if you use it probably. The best advice I was given is that you should READ ALL OF THE INSTRUCTIONS that come with it. And if water is draining down your throat, then you are doing it wrong.

*Please know that I am not a doctor or a nurse and have no medical expertise. This is simply a product I tried and like. Neither Netti Pot nor NasaFlo is not paying me to write this. Remember to always consult your own doctor before deciding if something like this is right for you. 

Detox Day 1 & a Quick Smoothie Recipe

Day one of our detox went smashingly well. I'm proud to say I didn't eat anything with excess sugar all day. This morning I started off with organic turkey sausage links (These are my favorite!) and a peanut butter & banana protein shake. We get them at our local Kroger and they are perfect for adding it a little extra protein to any meal.

This shake is super easy and tasty!  I keep several bananas chopped up and stored in ziplock baggies in our freezer so that they are easily accessible when I'm making my smoothies. 

So here's the smoothie: 

1 frozen banana (apprx. 90 calories)

8 oz of original almond milk (40 calories)

1 heaping tablespoon of peanut butter. You can also use almond butter but I was all out. (95 calories)

1 scoop of protein. I use About Time Chocolate Protein Powder.  (103 calories)
and ice! I almost forget ice.

Blend all of these together and feel free to adjust ingredients based on consistency. If it's too thick, add more almond milk. If it's not thick enough, add more peanut/almond butter. This really is so good and it satisfies my milkshake addiction. I LOVE milkshakes but they are so bad for you. A large chocolate milkshake from McDonalds has 880 calories! 220 of those are purely fat calories. Wowzers! This peanut butter/banana shake is about 330 calories and much better for you! 

For dinner tonight, I made potato, shrimp and corn bisque. Yummo! Hopefully I'll get that recipe up on the blog in the next few days. 

Thanks for following me on this journey to better health. And please know, I am not a doctor, a nurse or a dietician...just a girl trying to make better food choices. :) If y'all try my smoothie concoction, let me know if you like it! 

A Journey to Good Health.

It seems silly to open up a book and start reading in the middle of it, doesn't it? Yet I feel like that's what I'm doing by diving in and starting to write about my health journey from today. To get a little history, read this post. That might give you a little insight anyways. I never did write my health history, part 2. I think by the end of this, there might be a part 3, 4 and 5. :)

          On Tuesday, B & I both went to our doctor in Ruston, LA. This summer Dr. Goodyear gave us several take home tests to finish. None of the tests were pleasant and involved bottling up various bodily fluids and mailing them to different testing companies. I sort of felt like a lab rat by the time it was all said and done. Nevertheless all tests were completed and mailed off about 6 weeks ago. We were very eager to hear the results.

After saying our initial hellos & how are you doing, the first words out of the doc's mouth were, "Let's dive in, shall we? We have A LOT to talk about, especially with you, Cara. We found multiple issues." Just what you want to hear, right? "Multiple issues." This is on top of Celiac Disease, Fibromyalgia, Epstein Barr Virus (among others), multiple Vitamin Deficiencies, etc. that I have already been diagnosed with in earlier doctor visits. I was honestly hopeful that this dr visit would be different. I was hopeful but realistic. You see, B is my voice of logic. He's the intellectual one. I'm the emotional one. When I'm over here saying, "Let's have a baby!" He says, "You're not healthy enough yet." See, he's realistic. So before the doctor's appointment, B gave me a don't be disappointed speech so honestly I wasn't that too disappointed because I felt it coming.

So what else is wrong with me? To name a few: improper cortisol production, low progesterone, high testosterone, extremely low vitamin D levels... to sum it up for you...basically all of my hormones are out of whack. Honestly, the appointment was all very detailed but there was one word the dr kept repeating. INFLAMMATION. All of these different issues in my body is causing major inflammation which is why I'm in pain a majority of time. I won't bore you with all the details... well, I might if I understood exactly what was wrong with me. After he got finished explaining (or trying to explain) my test results, he asked if I had any questions. OF COURSE I HAVE QUESTIONS! But one main question is on my mind and has been for...well, all of my life: Can I have a baby? Is my body healthy enough to conceive? In one word. NO. But the dr. went on to explain why IF I were to try to get pregnant now that I would most likely not be able to carry the child past the first trimester. Was this a shock to me? No, not at all. 6 months ago the doctor told me the exact same thing and I knew my hormones hadn't miraculously corrected themselves. Now my question is WHEN? When can I have a baby? In the next year? Doctor's response: Probably so. Those words are like music to my ears.

The thing I love about my doctor is that while it may be slightly depressing to see about 12 typed pages listing everything that is wrong with you, Dr. Goodyear ALWAYS provides a solution. And it's hardly ever prescription drugs- another plus. So what's the answer? Get my hormones balanced so that I will be healthy enough to not only conceive a child but be able to enjoy life to the fullest! And how do we accomplish this? First things first: DETOX my body so that I will rid my body of toxins. After the detox I will be able to better absorb the nutrients and supplements my doc gives me.

Yes! We have a plan. We have a timeline in place. We have a goal in mind. Let's do this! Monday morning B & I will both start our diet detox. It will last 6 weeks and involves no caffeine. Yeah, that's right no caffeine. This morning I have drinking half-caf in order to prepare myself for what is to come.

Is this exciting? Yes! Is the detox most likely going to suck?  Well, of course! Will it all be worth it in the end? DEFINITELY.

Thanks for joining me on this journey. Hopefully this time next year I will be writing about the joys of pregnancy!

Health

I have gone back and forth about how much to share on this blog. I think this is a common concern with so many bloggers, especially those who are writing about their real life. I can fill pages and pages with adorable pictures of my doggies & kitties but it's like looking at somebody's grand babies, you can only take so much. After a while, they all are start to look the same, am I right? I have never considered myself a blogger or even someone who writes for others. I started this little blog to document our engagement, wedding and marriage. I'm sure my biggest fans are my mother in law (Hi, Mrs. Carole!) and my mother (Hi, mom!) But still, I have to wonder who else out there is reading this. What should I write about today and better yet, what should I NOT write about? I think a majority of couples would agree that the details of our marriage are off limits. While that may be what you readers want to hear (inquisitive minds what to know, am I right?), that would only do our marriage harm, in my opinion. Some things should remain sacred and marriage is number one on that list.

But what about my health? Earlier this year, I wrote My Health History, Part 1 and was amazed at the number of hits that post received. It is still the number one most popular post I've written. To me, that speaks volumes! Like I said, I write this blog for me. That may seem selfish, but I don't maintain this blog for monetary purposes. No one asks me to write posts. I just write what is going on in our lives. Some Most times it's boring and many weeks I just have nothing to write about. My health, however, is another story. I could fill pages writing about the weird things my body is doing any particular day. I've often considered starting another blog just to journal about nothing but my health. I'm pretty sure no one would have any interest in that blog, except for maybe my doctor. But still, I can't help but wish I had journaled all along this crazy journey to see how far I've come. I can't help but wonder how many people are going through what I'm going through. I have watched friends pour out their hearts on their blog and find so many others who are struggling with the exact same issues.

Here are two main reasons why I want to write more about my health:
    - I want to document my journey. Like I said, this is something I wish I had done all along. My goal is to one day hold my healthy baby in my arms and know that all of these tests were worth it. I want to be able to look back and read this blog and watch myself getting healthier and healthier each year and month. I want to wake up one morning without aches and pains and without a pounding migraine and be able to read this blog and remember how far I've come.

   - Another reason I want to blog more about my health is maybe it will help someone. If you are one of my close friends, then you know of my health struggles these last few years. It's not something I like to broadcast but it's there. Perhaps just opening up, even just a little bit, and putting my own pride and privacy aside for a moment may help someone else to ask questions about their own health. Because if I've learned anything these past several years, your health is EVERYTHING. I hope to encourage people who have been feeling poorly to get it checked out, get second opinions, go to a better doctor, eat healthier, and don't be satisfied with feeling horrible all the time!

So in conclusion, watch out for more posts about my health. I hope that it helps not just me to write about my journey.

Mid Week Confessions

Sometimes you just need to let it all out. WARNING: This week is a doozy. 

• I haven't posted since LAST Mid Week Confessions. 
• I slept til noon today. Yup, that's right. You heard me. NOON. Of course sleep is a relative term. I didn't actually sleep. I haven't been sleeping that well lately. For some reason I think it's logical to assume that if I didn't sleep well between the hours of midnight and 8am that I will sleep better between the hours of 8am and noon. This is, in fact, false. 
• I had this intense pain in both of my shoulders for about 2 1/2 weeks and I have no clue where it came from or better yet how to make it go away. I googled my symptoms and the best I can come up with is a thing called frozen shoulder.   Like I need something else that is wrong with me. But for a second if you can imagine me taking pictures (which is my profession) with TWO frozen shoulders? It's really a funny image but quite painful actually...hence the no sleep at night. Anyone ever experience this? 
• I have a migraine right now as I am writing this post. I took my migraine medicine and if you have known me long enough then you have probably seen me in my migraine medicine drunk state. It's not pretty. 
• I haven't posted any pics of our patio project, even though it's been completed now for about two weeks. Shame on me. 
• I haven't bought any pumpkins yet. This is the most disappointing confession of all. I'm usually first in line when our local nursery puts out the pumpkins on September 15th. Here it is Oct. 3 and I only have two sad looking mums on our front porch. 
• Oh, and remember that half marathon I was supposed to start training for on Monday? Yeah... about that... How about NEXT Monday?

Can we call for a do over on this week?... or better yet, let's fast forward to next week. How's your Wednesday going?

Read more Mid Week Confessions over at E, Myself & I's blog. 

Celiac Awareness Day

Many of you may know that I have Celiac Disease. I was diagnosed in February of 2007. Since my diagnosis, my life has become both better and worse at the same time. Well, before my diagnosis, I never really knew what was wrong with me and now I know waay too much! :) I am still finding out ways gluten destroyed my body every time I go to the doctor. I have had severe migraines, muscle aches, fibromyalgia, thyroid disease, epstein barr virus, CMV virus, several vitamin deficiencies and among other things. At one point I was taking 34 pills a day. My doctor told me at our last doctor appointment that he is concerned that I might not be able to carry a child through to full term IF I am ever able to get pregnant.

So why am I telling you this? All of these things were a result of me eating gluten and damaging my intestines. One out of 133 people have Celiac Disease. You might have it and not even know it.

"Celiac Disease is triggered by consumption of the protein called gluten, which is found in wheat, barley and rye. When people with celiac disease eat foods containing gluten, their immune system responds by damaging the finger-like villi of the small intestine. When the villi become damaged, the body is unable to absorb nutrients into the bloodstream, which can lead to malnourishment. Left untreated, people with CD can develop further complications such as other autoimmune diseases, osteoporosis, thyroid disease, and even cancer." - taken from the National Foundation for Celiac Awareness website

There are so many different symptoms that even something as little as a skin rash could be a sign of CD. Celiac Awareness Day is simply that. A Day to bring awareness. Please take a moment to go to this website, read the symptoms. Maybe you or a loved one will be spared years of pain because of it. If you suspect you might have Celiac Disease, ask you doctor to run a simple blood test. There is no CURE for Celiac Disease but the treatment is simple: cut ALL GLUTEN from your diet.

I am so thankful I was diagnosed when I was, at age 23. But unfortunately plenty of damage had already been done. I'm still on the road to recovery. I'm down to taking about 6 or 7 daily vitamin supplements. I feel healthier than I have in a long time. Buie and I are praying that one day God will bless us with healthy babies in the near future.

I am certainly not an expert by any means and you should definitely consult your doctor before starting a gluten free diet. :)

Sleep Cycle

If you know me pretty well or have ever lived with me then you know that I love to sleep. I'm like a cat. I require WAY too much sleep to survive. But now that I work from home, I have developed some very bad sleep habits. On a typical night I am in bed by midnight or so... It's the "or so" part that really gets me. Sometimes I get in an editing groove and stay up til 1, 2, or sometimes pushing 3am if I'm really on a roll. Now I rarely stay up that late just because. I stay up that late because I work best in the midnight (and beyond) hours. I'm not sure why -- I'm sure there have been studies done -- my brain goes into overdrive around 10pm and thinks it's time to work super hard. But for some reason I get more accomplished in those 3 or 4 hours than I do any other time of the day.

The problem? The rest of the world gets up at reasonable times like 6, 7 or 8 am while I am still sleeping because I've only just crawled into bed. If I don't get into bed til 3am, sometimes I'll sleep til 11am and so starts the endless cycle. Because I slept so late, I eat breakfast around noon, lunch around suppertime and supper around 9pm... You see the problem here.

I think there are several reasons why I do this:

• I've always been a night owl. 
• I don't have a regular day to day schedule. Each day differs depending on whether I have a shoot or not, what I'm editing that day, if I'm traveling, etc. 
• My husband doesn't have a regular schedule. Being a retail manager his schedule is every changing as well. One day he may work a 7am-4pm and the next day he may work a 2pm-midnight shift. 
• I not really a "stick to a schedule" type of gal.
• I'm weird. 

The solution? So here's what I have done time and time again to break the cycle: I go to bed on time (sometime around 11:30 or midnight) and get at a normal time (by 8am). That way, I'm tired again by 10 or 11pm. This is an easy way to break the cycle but you forget my most productive hours are in the wee morning hours.

source

So here's the question? How do I make the most of my awake hours so that I may get a proper night's sleep and at a normal hour?

All of the things I'm coming up (such as make lists, plan ahead, get organized, set priorities) make me sound old and boring. Sigh. I guess that's what comes with owning your own business. SOMEONE'S got to be organized. I guess it has to be me, huh.

My health history: Part 1

On this blog I talk about anything from our crazy love of dogs to my adorable niece and nephew because this is MY blog and well, quite frankly I CAN. I like to write about things that are important to me: my family, my animals, traveling, being "green", photography, art, etc. Lately, I've been concentrating a lot more on my health because I've learned (the hard way) that if I don't make my health a priority then I will forever be talking about how horrible I feel today. And honestly, well, I don't want to be known as the person who complains all the time about her health. I am very aware of how much I talk about my health to those around me. My mom and my husband probably get more than their ear full and God bless them for always providing a listening ear. Looking back in the last 5 years I have made leaps and bounds. Leaps and bounds, I tell ya! I am a new woman but I am still not the woman I want to be.

This is my life. I am taking control.

Let's take a look back... this is mainly for me but also for those interested in my health history. Obviously, a lot of this is personal so I won't go into a lot of details but feel free to leave me a comment or email if you are struggling with the same or similar issues and I will be glad to discuss more with you in private.

"Were you sick as a child?" I get this question a lot actually. And the easiest way I know how to answer it is this: I was a normal healthy active child. Yes, I got colds every now and then like other kids but I don't really ever remember being extrememly sick. My only real memory of extreme pain comes from elementary school when I use to have 30 minutes drive to and from school every day. I used to get these horrible migraines in the afternoon. I remember laying down in the backseat of the car very often on the rides home, praying we would arrive home soon. Now whether these migraines had anything to do with my current health problem, I do not know. Maybe it was some sort of foreshadowing in to the future...

My true real health problems begin in college.

2003 - 2005 I struggled with my health for several years in college, suffering from intense migraines, body aches and many other unexplainable symptoms. I missed a lot of class due to illness. I'm sure my professors thought I was lazy. The truth is I had no clue what was going on with my body. I turned to drinking and partying for a few years to help with the pain which, of course, only ended up making things worse. During this time is also when I was first diagnosed with depression after one of my best friends died of leukemia.

May 2005 - I remember being so incredibly sick with pneumonia, bronchitis, laryngitis, etc. This was my senior year of college. (Random side note: This was also the month I met Buie. He brought me soup and sat with me for one of our first "dates.") The day after I graduated college I flew to Montreal for 2 weeks. In hindsight, this was a stupid decision as I ended up getting a lot worse. I went to a nice French doc who loaded me up with lots of steroids, antibiotics and an inhaler to help me breath.

Summer of 2005 - I took yet another trip but this time it was to South Africa to visit friends. This whole trip was a blur of back pain, upset stomach and Ib profen tablets. I think I owe my friend, Angie, a family size bottle of Ib profen because I finished off hers in the 3 1/2 weeks I was there. The plane trip there and back was so painful, I swore I would not make another long overseas flight until I knew what was wrong with me and I was well. After this trip was when my mom and I decided to take action. I was tired of living in constant agony.

That same summer I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia by a local physican. Before this time I had never heard of Fibro. I started researching it and finally connected some of my symptoms such as: unrelenting fatigue, depression, flu like muscle aches, migraine headaches, constant joint pains, and even IBS. Ok, things were starting to make sense a little bit. But WHY do I have all of these symptoms? There had to be a reason.

2006 - If you were close with me during this time, you remember this was a hard time for me. I must apologize to my roommates at the time. I cried a lot. I slept a lot. It was not a fun time for anyone.

Fall 2006 - I found the Fibro and Fatigue Center of Dallas and my life started to change. I was taking control and I have my parents to thank for everything - for footing the bill, for driving me to and from appointments in Dallas, for listening to my cry when I was in so much pain to move. Thank you, mom, for being my rock during this time.

I had about a bazillion tests run and found out that I had several serious viruses living in my body which were causing me to get sick and stay sick: 1) parvovirus infection 2) epstein-barr virus 3) Cytomegalovirus or CMV This was all kind of overwhelming news but totally treatable. It's not cancer. It's not terminal. It's treatable. I knew it was going to be a long road ahead of me but what choice did I have?

My treatment would take place in Dallas, Texas which was over 5 hours away from where I lived. Let me just say, I LOVE Southwest Airlines and I am so thankful they have a direct flight from Little Rock to Dallas. I can't tell you how many times in the last few years I have taken that flight.

I flew in to Dallas every 6 weeks or so to meet with my doctor and get IV treatments.

I was prescribed about a 30 or so different supplements. Seriously, at one point I was taking 34 pills twice a day. That's 68 pills a day for all you math enthusiasts. I remember taking so many pills it would literally make myself sick. I would have to space them out and take a couple of pills every 20 minutes or so, which basically meant I was popping pills from the time I woke up from the time I went to bed to kill these stupid viruses.

The damage that these viruses had done to my body is something I am still recovering from. Vitamin deficiencies, anemia, thyroid disease, chronic fatigue syndrome, autoimmune disease etc. - these would all soon be normal vocabulary in the next coming years. And I would soon find out that so would the word gluten and Celiac Disease.

Looking up

Several weeks ago I wrote about my health. My health has been a normal topic of discussion in our household and amongst my family members in the last 5 years or so. I've come along way since being diagnosed in 2007 with Celiac Disease but lately I have been suffering from some not-so-fun consequences of the illness.

This past fall I switched doctors and was retested in many areas. I (following my dr's advice, of course) am concentrating on trying to improve upon these four main areas:

Vitamin D Deficiency: Things are looking up! yay! I've been vitamin D deficient for many years but thank goodness things are turning a corner. Normal vitamin D levels are between 50-70 ng/mL. My doc said he'd like to see my levels around 65 or 70. This past fall my vitamin D levels tested around 20. No bueno. :( This week they retested and I'm at 40! They upped my dosage from 10,000 units to 15,000 units/per day so hopefully I'll be in the 70's in no time. I'm thinking a little beach vacay with plenty of sunshine might just get me to the normal levels. :)

Candida Yeast: I am still doing a yeast free diet.... 99% of the time. I'll admit that I regularly sneak in a cup of coffee (or 2) per week but overall the yeast free diet is helping a lot. The main difference I've noticed is my face has really cleared up. My muscles aches and pains have eased up some and my cravings for sugar has decreased dramatically. I'll be staying on this yeast free diet for a little bit longer. I may just have to find a gluten free king cake for Mardi Gras though and have a cheat day. ;)

Thyroid: I'm still having some thyroid issues but my numbers are getting better....slowly.

Adrenal Gland: I haven't been retested on this yet. I still get really exhausted and feel fatigued most of the time but this probably is because my vitamin D levels are still low.

So why am I giving you a complete medical history? Believe me, it is definitely NOT conclusive, but I do want to record my progress along the road. Hopefully one day all of my lab tests will be 100% normal. I can look back and read about my journey of how far I've come physically and it will all be worth it! :)

Yeast Free: Day 1

I looked at the numbers on the scale one more time because that was the last time I would see numbers that big... ever again. You see, Candida yeast is in all of us. It is a fungus, a form of yeast, that live in your mouth and in your intestines. Candida is kept under control by the amount of good bacteria that live in our gut. So what happens when we don't have enough friendly bacteria? Yup. You guessed it. Candida yeast grows, like the fungus like it is, out of control, destroying everything in its path and making you (or me, in this case) feel miserable. Too much Candida can damage your body tissue, organs and destroy your immune system, not to mention release actual poison into your bloodstream.

So what's a girl to do? Attack. Yeast needs sugar to live. So cut off all yeast and sugar and the Candida dies. It's a slow & painful process to your body, but something that must be done. Many have described it like going through withdrawals from an addiction to drugs or alcohol. My doctor warned me it will get a lot worse before it gets before. But this is normal. This is the yeast cells dying inside. I am not looking forward to the "die-off" period but I am willing to go through it for the final results. I long for a day when I wake up with no headache, backache, bloating, fatigue, stomach ache, itchy skin, etc. etc. etc.

Day 1. You gotta start somewhere, right? Today I woke up feeling sore physically. The feeling of aching muscles is something I have become accustomed to. Mentally, I am ready. Let's do this. I have never been a soldier at war or even a very competitive person for that matter, but I am going into battle. Candida yeast is going DOWN! I think that's the only way to look at this. Every bite of sugar or yeast I put in my body, I am basically just giving yeast the weapons to destroy me...because that is exactly what it's doing.

My plan of attack:: Be prepared. I already have a menu prepared for the week. Here's what today looks like. (Don't worry. I won't blog about what I'm eating everyday.)

Breakfast today: Egg white omelet with spinach

Lunch: Grilled chicken breast and sliced raw cucumber

snack: green apples slices with almond butter

Dinner: Tuna steaks, brown rice and broccoli

I'm excited about the journey ahead and check back in about my progress toward the end of the week! Thanks for all of your support!

PS. Check out this site for more information about Candida yeast. I've been doing a lot of reading and found this site to be very helpful.

Am I ready?

As I sat down to write a new post that I thought was going to be on eating a yeast free diet, my kitty Charlie hopped into my lap as he always does at this time of night. Sometimes it's annoying to try to type with 7 pounds of fur laying across my arms but tonight I just listened to him purr. Sometimes I look at my animals and wonder if the only mom I'll ever be is to them. Will I have kids of my own? I wonder what they will be like. Will they look like me? Will they play sports like Buie? Will they have their mother's math skills? (Let's hope not)

There are so many questions when thinking about kids, like the big one: Are we even ready for kids? (I mean, who is really ever ready? Am I right?) Are we mentally prepared for the change? Quite possibly no. Are we financially ready? Um... how much do babies cost again? And the million dollar question: Am I PHYSICALLY ready for children? The answer my doctor so clearly gave me last week was NO. I am not physically ready for children. So why do we want what we can't have? Ever since then, I can't stop thinking about babies. In the last week I have found myself in these random places like BabiesRus and the toy section at Walmart.... of course it could very likely be that I am an aunt now and was just Christmas shopping for my niece and nephew. Speaking of nieces and nephews, I blame them, you know.... for this whole baby thing. It's all their fault. If they weren't so darn cute, I wouldn't want a baby. Sigh.

So.... originally I was going to write about starting a yeast free diet. Tomorrow I start the diet. Be looking for more about cutting yeast out of your diet.

Yeast Free. PLUS the already Gluten Free & Dairy Free. Shouldn't be too hard, right?

Don't I sound excited? I plan to blog about my progress along the way. Wish me luck!

Naked

After opening up a bit and sharing our tough news with you all, I have been overwhelmed with the texts, emails, sweet phones calls, hugs and prayers from you all. First of all, thank you for lifting up my sister in law, Nicole. She is doing great and is taking the advice of her doctor by taking it easy. She, Craig and Landon are down in Minden with me this weekend so she has plenty of hands to help her out.

I have been hesitant to share much more on this blog than news of our dogs, cats, our recent travels, or what event we attended recently, etc.. Rarely do I open my heart and share my fears, worries or health concerns. I have never really thought of myself as a private person in the past but in today's social media crazed world, a private thought or word is almost hard to come by. I think many people put way too much on Facebook and twitter exposing themselves too deeply. I have never wanted to be one of those people. My last post I put my toe in the water a little and opened up a bit. I felt vulnerable. Today at church many people came up today and told me they were praying for me because they read my blog post. I felt naked. I felt exposed. I wanted to run and hide and go put some clothes on! (Don't worry. I actually did have clothes on in church.)

So, did I learn anything from opening up? I guess I learned that a whole lot more people read my blog than I thought. ha. But the main thing I've learned is that it's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to share yourself with others. You might just find out something about yourself in the process. You might also learn that there are a lot of people going through the exact same thing as you are. Let's help each other out and go through this life together because goodness knows we can't do it alone.

And because I miss my baby Conner so much... here's something to make you smile. Thank you for your love and support, friends.

tough week

This has definitely been a tough week for our family. My sister in law and brother found out some hard to swallow news about their pregnancy. She is 17 weeks along and just found out she has complete placenta previa. This basically means the placenta is in the wrong place and is blocking the birthing canal. There are many complications with placenta previa that COULD make this a scary thing including enough heaving bleeding to need blood transfusions. The baby could be born prematurely and Nicole will most likely have a C-section.

As of now, Nicole is not on complete bed rest but as been ordered to not pick up Landon at all and to take it easy. I am so thankful she is married to a patient and wonderful man. My brother, Craig, takes such good care of her. We are all praying for a safe and healthy pregnancy. I know that the Lord has his hand on this baby and He has a plan for that tiny little life. I know that you will also join me in prayer for Craig, Nicole, Landon and baby Walker as they figured out life with a few more kinks in it.

more not so great news....

Yesterday I traveled down to Ruston, LA for my second doctor's appointment with this new dr. I am trying out. (It's the same dr my mother goes to.) I've seen him once before when I came to do all of my 25 vials of blood work.

Thursday was results day. Yuck.

In a way I was dreading results day but I just wanting to get it over with. I have had several results days in the past 5 or 6 years of my life, some good and some not so good, but this one seemed different. This one seemed more hopeful.

Results: (the four MAIN issues)

severe vitamin D Deficiency

low adrenal function

low thyroid

too much yeast in my system

Not exactly the results I was hoping for by any stretch of the imagination but it's totally doable. There are thousands of people struggling with way worse. So what does this mean for me right now? Well, babies are NOT in our immediate future which is very saddening to us. I mean when your doctor tells you that having a baby would be the WORST thing you could do to your body right now, then I figure I should probably take his advice. So please don't expect babies from me and if you ask about babies - why we don't have any or when we are having them, expect tears to start flowing soon thereafter. You have been warned.

The other thing you can expect from me: crabbiness. lots of crabbiness. I mean, not only can I not have gluten but I for real can't eat yeast. I threw around this idea a few months ago and did some research on a yeast free diet and it almost seemed laughable. I guess I am the one laughing now. No dairy. No yeast. No sugar. No coffee. NO FUN! = CRABBINESS. Lots and lots of crabbiness.

More expectations: Needles. I am already used to needles. So used to them I could probably find my veins faster than any of the new nurses could. You can always tell who the NEW nurses are by how shaky their hands are. Drives me insane. I have to get more IV injections with vitamin D, vitamin C, magnesium and lots of other good stuff flowing straight into my veins. I call it liquid gold. It's the good stuff. I would take an IV any day over pills.

So does my diagnosis suck? Yes. But is it doable. Of course.

Does Nicole wish she had a normal pregnancy? Of course. She probably wishes she could pick up her kid too for the next 5 or 6 months. We Walker/Buie women are tough. But we still might need some prayers. ;)

It's Monday!

Well, I had a lazy lazy weekend. I'm not sure what's going on with me health wise but the most I did all weekend was go to church and even that was an effort in itself since we live 30 minutes away from our church. I have literally not felt like doing much of anything since we can home from New Orleans. It took me like three days to do all of my laundry from our trip, mainly because it was too much of an effort to carry it down to the washer. I have been exhausted. Maybe the summer heat is finally getting to me. Maybe the cultural shock from going to Louisiana then coming back to Arkansas hit me. ha! Just kidding. Maybe I'm just ready for football season! That must be it. I don't know what it is but I'm ready to get out of this funk. I feel better this morning. I have a bit more energy. It might have something to do with the two cups of coffee AND the 5 hour energy I had this morning. I'm just hoping my heart doesn't explode. Remember when I tried to give up coffee last year. haha. Yeah, what was I thinking?

Well, if you need something to do today, go check out the pictures we had taken of us by Jen Amato in New Orleans. They're posted on her blog! When we get the CD in the mail, I'll post a few of our favorites on our blog. :) Hope y'all are having a great Monday!

And I have to give a shout out to my wonderful dad who is turning 60 today! Thanks for being the best dad to me - for always supporting my creative endeavers, for always forgiving my not-so-smart endeavers and for always making me smile. :) I love you daddy!

Wintertime Blues

Do you have the blues?

I don't know about y'all but I am experiencing the wintertime blues. Did you know that this is a real thing? It's called Seasonal Affection Disorder and people with Fibromyalgia are more prone to S.A.D. (and yes, it spells SAD), especially in the wintertime. For some reason, this winter has been particularly hard on me, physically and emotionally. If you are still confused about Seasonal Affection Disorder, here are a few typical symptoms associated with SAD::

• difficulty waking up in the morning
• increased daytime sleepiness
• lack of energy
• decreased interest in work and other activities
• carbohydrate cravings, leading to overeating and weight gain
• difficulty concentrating
• withdrawal from family, friends, and social situations
  

Do any of these things sound familiar? Hmmm... maybe it's just me, then. ;)

Well, I may not have the cure for the wintertime blues but I'd like to share what I do for relief for a long winter of the "Blue Monday" and Fibromyalgia.

1. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Make sure you get plenty of sleep. I cannot stress this enough. Not getting enough sleep is probably the worst thing you can do to your body. Your body heals and recovers while you sleep. On the other hand, you will be tempted to over sleep and sleep WAY too much if you are suffering from depression, SAD, and/or fibromyalgia. All or even one of these things will make you want to stay in bed all day. Get the right amount of sleep for you, but face the day each morning rested and with a smile! :) (I am talking to myself here)


Melatonin. If you have problems sleeping, 3mg of melatonin might just do the trick. Melatonin is a naturally occuring hormone that helps with sleep. If you find yourself needing a little help in the sleep department but don't want to resort to sleeping pills, try melatonin. It's all natural and it won't make you feel groggy the next morning. Start out at 1mg and increase up to 12mg. (Again, please consult with your doctor. I am not a doctor - just merely making suggestions on what works for me.)


2. Exercise. This is the last thing I feel like doing but believe me, you will be glad you did. Exercise increases endorphins, which makes you happy. :) (Is anyone else quotting Reese Whitherspoon in Legally Blonde right now? Remember when she says endorphins make you happy and happy people don't kill people? haha) ANYWAY, moral of the story is you should exercise whether you feel like it or not. Your body and your mind will thank you later.

3. Vitamin D. One thing your body lacks in the winter is Vitamin D. We usually hibernate in the winter because it is colder, therefore we get less sunshine, and therefore less vitamin D. This vitamin plays a crucial role to bone and muscle strength. Vitamin D deficiency has a direct correlation to depression so supplementing this vitamin, especially in the winter months in vital. (make sure to speak with your doctor before starting on a supplement. Too much vitamin D can also be harmful.)

4. Heat. I should probably put this one right up there with sleep because heat is so important to someone in constant pain. Heat comes in many forms:: hot showers, hot baths, heatings pads, fireplace, a warm blanket, fuzzy slippers, your favorite sweatshirt, hot tea or cider, electric blanket... and the list goes on. You can see why winter is not my favorite month, but then again you can see why the fireplace IS my favorite.

5. De-stress. This one has been hard for me. I would definitely say that I'm still working on this one. When I think of destressing, I think of a harmonious home with everything its in place and the angels are singing the Hallelujah chorus. ha! My home is far from perfect but I'm learning to say no to things when I just can't handle anything else on my plate.


6. Diet. You knew I was going to mention this one, right? Sigh... As much as I don't want to admit it, the things we eat have a direct effect on how we feel, look, and act...oh and don't forget weigh. If you have fibromyalgia or even if you are suffering from those wintertime blues, eliminating things like caffeine, MSG, sugar, processed foods, yeast, red meat and yes, even gluten will help you feel more alive and energetic. So what can you eat, you ask? Eat a diet rich in greens, nuts (but not peanuts), beans, fish, organic chicken. There are plenty of healthy foods to choose from that aren't processed. One of my favorite websites for eating whole and organic foods is http://www.wholeliving.com/



Good luck beating those winter blues!

Canton, Domino, Doctor

Canton:

There is so much for fill you in on it might just take all week but I wanted to share a little bit of my busy weekend. If you follow me on twitter, then you know that my mom and I had a full weekend in Canton, Tx at the largest trade show event in the country. We actually ran into the former mayor of the city (who proceeded who hit on my mother- no joke!) - he told us that there was 1 MILLION people there last weekend at Canton. ONE MILLION! That's just insane! In the next post or two, I want to write about our time in Canton and even tell about some of my favorite booths. This was my first time there but it definitely won't be my last!

Domino:

The Buies are back in the game...the fostering game, that is. We took a little break from fostering if you'll remember. We had Scooter, then quickly joined the Foster Failure Club when we decided to adopt him, then we had Huckleberry, Anabel, and Maggie. We also were substitute fosters for a while. We've even done some dog-sitting. But we are big believers in C.A.R.E. and couldn't stay away for long so we welcomed little Domino into our house last night. She is a precious Cocker Spaniel mix (same as Conner). We already love her and know Conner and Scooter will too.

Doctor:

While I was in the great state of Texas this past weekend I saw my doctor. I see a specialist in the Dallas area for Fibromyalgia and have now for about four years now. He's the one who diagnosed me with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Celiac Diease. In 2007 I began eating gluten free and life changed for the better for the most part but I still have issues. Yesterday my doctor suggested I start a yeast free diet to combat the many infections and viruses in my body. You see, I have several autoimmune diseases and it is hard for me to overcome illnesses like the normal person. This will be a lifelong struggle but I am grateful to have family to be supportive throughout this process. I am thinking about using this blog as I try new yeast free, dairy free and gluten free recipes (oh yeah, I have to be dairy free, too, did I mention that?) I'll get into more of the diet thing more later, though. Thanks for listening. :)

Hope ya'll had a great weekend! Love ya'll!