At first glance...

I recently pulled out my wedding DVD with my bridal images, our wedding images and these lovely gems, our engagement photos. These images were taken almost 8 years ago in Little Rock by a dear friend of ours. They are dear to my heart for many reasons. When I look back at these images at first I notice how much skinner I look - how depressing. At first glance I might, I might say, "Wow, my teeth look so white! I need to cut back on the coffee!" I might even notice that my Buie is a few pounds lighter in these photos, too (sorry babe) but none of those things matter.  At first glance, I thought, "oh I remember that shirt! I wonder where it is...not that I could fit in it anymore..."

Despite the physical changes we have gone through since these pictures were taken, when I look at these images taken just a couple months before we were married, it reminds me of the beginning...when everything was fresh and new. It reminds me that I had no clue what love was. Yes, we look blissfully happy like someone spiked our morning coffee or perhaps we were just drunk in love as Beyonce would say. While I'm pretty sure our friend, Christen, just said something funny to make us laugh, it's still nice to think about how excited we were to be planning our wedding. (And I must mention that my mom did everything. So thanks, mom.) While we had already been together for 3 years at this point, conquered a breakup and been a part while I traveled to not one but two different countries... we were still in the beginning of love. 

What I have learned about love in the last 10+ years is that LOVE is not what I thought love was at all.  Love is not a white horse or climbing up a balcony or a red single rose glittering in the spotlight or dancing the night away at a ball and loosing your slipper. Love is not some crazy romantic proclamation of affection in some grand place with fireworks going off in the background and your own 4 string quartet playing and an audience cheering in the background. Love isn't even finding your soulmate or finding "the one" that was meant for you. I know this is debatable for some so let's just move on, shall we? :) 

Love is a decision to put someone in your life and continually walk beside them hand in hand no matter what life throws your way. Love is a sacrifice. Love is the hardest thing I have ever done. Love is getting up every single day and forgetting yourself and your selfish instinct.  Love is holding your hair back while your throwing up. Love is checking a tick bite in places you can't reach or even see! :) Love is bringing you home your favorite snack because you'd had a horrible day. Love is watching Project Runway instead of your twelfth football game of the day because you know it's your wife's favorite. ;) Love is forgiving before the other one even say they're sorry. Love is sometimes so ugly, it's beautiful. Do you know what I mean? Love is no makeup, no shaving, no showering for a week and still falling helplessly in each others arms because that is the only place that feels like home. 

Another thing I have learned is that I may be THE most stubborn person on the face of this planet... No, seriously. When we got married it was a major wake up call to me how selfish and stubborn I am...and still am. Well, we are BOTH pretty stubborn. ;) But it's been almost 8 years of learning to give and take, learning HOW to communicate with each other and learning how to sacrifice and possibility even letting the other be right every now and then. ;) 

So when I look at the these images now, I don't see how we've changed physically, although we have and we will continue to grow old together. I don't see a giddy engaged couple ready to tie the knot. I see how much our LOVE has grown over the past 10+ years (including our dating years). I love this man more this morning than I did yesterday morning. The difference? Everyday I wake up and pray for our marriage, I pray for me, I pray for him, I pray for our future children (if God's chooses to bless us with any). I choose to love him every day. He is the best roommate I could ask for. He is the best movie partner, jeopardy teammate, dog dad, best friend that I could ask for. Some times I don't always *like* him (and I KNOW he would say the same) but I will always wake up and *choose* him. Every single day. 

That, to me, is love. 

photography by Christen Byrd

Magic Buie and a little thing called RESPECT.

Since the movie Magic Mike has taken America by storm, Buie and I have had several conversations about how sad it is that a movie has such popularity among MARRIED women. The same holds true for the book series: 50 Shades of Grey. My husband, who works as a manager of a large corporate chain bookstore, he has been astounded at the number of women coming in to buy these books - women of all ages. As someone who is on the internet, social media and connected with blogs, I, too, have been shocked by the amount of married women talking about the popular Magic Mike movie. Do I think you are wrong for watching and/or reading these books? No. This is not a post to put down, criticize or blame anyone. In fact my intentions are quite the opposite. I simply wanted to share what's on my heart when it comes to the word RESPECT.

As a hard headed and stubborn woman, I can very easily forget the importance of respect. I know exactly what it means but I often forget to put it into practice.  I sometimes think that it's my mission in life to have the last word or to always be right. But then I remember my true mission as a wife. As a Christian wife it is my responsibility to love & respect my husband in every way possible. I guess the thing that I have a problem with when it comes to movies and books such as these, is the lack of respect. How much respect is shown to my husband if I spend a couple hours of my evening watching a lust-filled movie? It's safe to say, none. Ladies, how would we feel if our husband had a guys night and decided to go see a movie showing half naked women dancing around on a stage? Um...it's safe to say we would have more than a few words to say about it. So why does this book and this movie bother me so much? It's all about respect for your man. Don't you think your husband wants YOU to gush over him just as women are doing about Channing Tatum? But even more than that, don't you honestly think that your husband is more of a MAN than the dancers in that movie? If your husband is anything like mine, then of course he is. My husband is a real man and I'm saddened to see that the world apparently thinks that a "real" man must have a six pack and dance around on a stage in a thong. Respect your husband, ladies. Adore the things he does for your family. Remind him how much HE means to you, not some silly movie. When was the last time we all got excited about how awesome our husbands are?  I have my very own Magic Buie living in my house. He is awesome. He is a man of his word. He is loyal, committed, steadfast. He is my rock. He cooks for me and takes care of me when I'm sick and when he's feeling good he might even turn on Pandora and dance around in the kitchen while he's cooking. ha! (He might kill me for saying that! ) But seriously, who needs Magic Mike when I've got Magic Buie? ;)

It's all about respect.

Buie and I had this very talk just last night about this movie and all day it has been weighing on my mind. Today I randomly came across this blog post that puts wonderfully into words exactly what I feel. I encourage you to read it.

The point of my post is not really about some dumb movie or a popular book that's flying off the bookshelves. And it is certainly not my intention to make you feel bad if you have seen it or read the book. If you've seen it, ok. It really doesn't matter but what DOES matter is the real man in your life. So go tell him what he means to you. If you haven't seen it, then I encourage you NOT to see it and instead, go take your man out for a nice steak dinner and tell him how proud you are of him.

Please understand that this is my opinion. I understand that many, if not MOST, people do not agree with me. This is my blog and I'm entitled to my opinion, though. :)

the love of a great man.

It's Valentine's Day in the world or at least in the Western world where most of society believes in overindulging in little candied hearts, red balloons and filling up on sugar. I'm not much on the commercialization of holidays (unless I can get crafty with it). Alas, this year I did nothing crafty...unless you consider buying a Hallmark card crafty. Now before you judge me and call me a scrooge, please understand I have no objections to the holiday devoted to love. But honestly, I don't expect my husband to do or act any differently than he does the other 364 days out of the year. If Buie only expressed his love once a year, I don't think he would be the man for me.... and more than that, if Buie expressed his love for me in chocolate candies and overpriced flowers I would feel seriously unloved.

• I know I am loved every time he calls me at work on his lunch break just to check in with me.
• I know I am loved when he brings home my favorite magazine from work (he works at a bookstore) just because he was thinking about me.
• I know I am loved when he takes care of me when I'm sick.
• I know I am loved with each meal he cooks for me - which is a lot by the way. He does most of the cooking in our house. :)

Yes, I know I am loved. I don't need hearts, flowers, and chocolate...but it SURE doesn't hurt. ;)

Happy Valentine's Day! No matter who you are celebrating this day with, know you are loved. 1 John 4:19 We love because He first loved us.

Catching up! (snow days & V-day)

My life has been a whirl wind in the past 2 or 3 weeks. Besides the fact that I quit my full time job and I'm going full time with photography, I have seriously neglected my blog this month. So I'm playing catch up!

Hmmm, let's see... We got 6 inches of snow and I had a couple of snow days with my honey. We made chili, snuggled by the fire and watched lots of Netflix! I also shot a fun engagement session in the snow. Check it out over at my photography blog!

We celebrated my father-in-law's birthday by going out to dinner at Texas Roadhouse! Nothing says "Happy Birthday!" like a big STEAK!

The Buies were low key this year for Valentine's Day...or so I thought we were going to be. B and I had briefly discussed V-day and we normally just go to dinner or pick up dinner and just spend time together. This year Valentine's Day was on my last day of work. It was a weird, happy, bitter sweet day. B sent me a 12 chocolate covered strawberries. So sweet! and probably the best V-day present ever! All day long I said my good-byes, finished up my work, cleaned out my desk all the while munching on the best gourmet strawberries ever! B had to work Valentine's night but when I got home from my last day of work and walked into our bedroom there were a dozen roses and a sweet note from him. I'm so blessed to have a husband who takes care of me and loves me... and sending me goodies never hurts either! :)

More catching up coming soon....

FREE Valentine's Day cards

If you've been a follower of my blog for long, then you know my thoughts on the commercialism of Valentine's Day. I've said it once and I'll say it again:: You shouldn't have to wait til a holiday to tell those people close to you how much you love them. However, with that said, I found these super cute and best of all FREE downloadable Valentine's Day cards. I am all about handmade, meaningful presents above all, but I can't pass up FREE! Go here to download these two cards and print as much as you like! Give them to your work friends, mail one to your BFF just for fun or print them for your kids school friends. :) Happy V-day!

First Comes Love, Then Comes ...

In the South, you know how it goes:: go to college, meet a nice boy, get engaged, get married, then immediately people start asking, "When are y'all going to have a baby?" Well, the same has been true for us. We have been married for 2 and a half years and yes there has been talk of kids. In fact, I hope that is something that all couples at least discuss BEFORE marriage. I would hate to go into a marriage thinking the other partner wants kids only to find out the opposite. Anyway, to answer your questions, yes, we both want kids. How many? We have no idea. When? Who knows. By what means? Well, besides the obvious answer... Hopefully, two ways: Adoption (God-willing) and one or two of our own. I was hesitant to write this post because I don't want to excite the grandparents too much but it is only natural to start wondering when is the right time for kids. Many of our friends already have kids, some even have several kids. Some days I think I am more ready than others. On good days I think I am ready to do this, to be a mom. Other days I think heck no!

I ran across this email at work that I thought was too good not to share.
Lesson 1

1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Sugguest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behaivor.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

This isn't even the whole email but I thought I'd save some for another time. Does this sound like anything I want to RUSH into? I think NOT. On the other hand, everyone I have talked to have said it was all worth it in the end, which I'm sure it is. I'm just not quite ready for it yet. But I have a feeling it'll be here sooner than I think.